I nearly lost a friend this week. A very old friend. Through stubbornness.
We were watching The Celtic being hammered, four goals down at half time. He likes a debate/argument does my friend and I was happy to oblige, until he hit a nerve. And I got angry. And raised my voice. I almost never raise my voice, unless I am singing, and I certainly wasn't singing! I had to leave the bar and cool down in the back alley. (I had only had two drinks at this stage.) After about ten minutes I decided to go back inside and watch the second half of the game but as soon as I got to my barstool I just took my coat and left. I was still angry.
Eight days later and still no contact. It was eating me up, why hadn't he called to apologise? Then it hit me, maybe he didn't think he had to. So I bit the bullet, sent him a message saying I was sorry to have raised my voice to him. He replied saying he never meant to 'touch a nerve '.
I'm glad I didn't let a 35 year relationship go down the pan.
You did the right thing, sweetpea. I didn't and now, I think it's too late. xoxox
ReplyDeleteOh missus I don't ever think it could be too late?
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It can be tough to say you're sorry. But I am glad you both realized your part in the situation and were able to get back to being friends. 35 years is too much to sacrifice over a little heated debate! xoxo
ReplyDeletePon, I couldn't believe I was so angry! I bought a bottle of gin on the way home and drank quite a bit! I'm so happy we're still pals, I would have hated myself if we had 'broken up!'
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I recognise that scenario. Sometimes it takes me quite a while to reach a calm enough place before I can see "being right" isn't always the most important thing.
ReplyDeleteSee, we're very similar that way. See you one day soon my friend.
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Nicely done... we're all circling the drain, and words unspoken can haunt us for the rest of our lives.
ReplyDeleteI let it drag for eight days, seven and a half days too many. I love the big angry fecker too much!
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Dad always said it takes a bigger man to apologize. Glad a single moment didn't ruin a 35 year friendship. x
ReplyDeleteMy Da used to say the same.
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I'm in the middle of that very thing right now. A friend from the time I was 15 years old made a crack about the church that upset my wife. That was back in July. We haven't spoken since. Don't know if we ever will.
ReplyDeleteI'm proud of you Martin. I've been accused of apologising before I've even done anything but I don't want to change. My Mum would say 'Never let the sun go down on your anger.' You've put it right - that's the main thing.
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