"Holy mother of God, the high notes are playing havoc with my tight undies."
I know I shouldn't. I'm trying to watch my waistline but I'm so damn hungry.
Just about to introduce one of the biggest stars in Ireland and I've forgotten his name...
"Jaysus,I think I just followed through!"
"Sweet Mary, look which big ugly looking eejit just walked in. Did I rub out the pencil marks on each of the gold bottles I took a wee nip fae? ... too late the noo" (I can do this all night wee man)
Before I came on stage tonight I went to the fridge to check my burgers, aaaaannndddd they're off!
"Ladies and gentlemen, I shall start this evenings entertainment off with a gentle canter of words by the bard... To eat horse, or not to eat horse, that is equestrian."
"It's disgusting this horsemeat business and I'm glad I don't eat burgers" said Chef Files at the Burns supper as he tucked into his minced lungs, brains, liver, balls, eyes, and arsehole wrapped in a sheeps stomach lining.
"It turns out that the horses were molested before they were turned into Tesco burgers... The police are asking anyone who knew Jimmy Saddle to come forward."
Well someone's making up for lost time! :¬)
So I was backing up when I discovered, THAT's where they left the microphone stand.ORWhat do you mean I have to open for (most dreaded Band in your opinion)?!
Uncle Fester does Vegas?