I remember a night, long ago, I was maybe 6? Ma sent me to the shops, local, back in the days when kids could be sent to the shops without fear, or even the knowledge, that there were 'weird' fuckers out there waiting to pounce on yer kids!
Anyway, I remember this evening so well. My siblings had gone to bed, and Ma wanted something (cigarettes), from the local shop. I saw a little bottle of paint, and a brush in the window. But I knew, even in my little kiddie head, that we couldn't afford such luxuries!
This to me was all my Santa's dreams coming together. To say we were poor was an understatement! And yes, I know my Ma was buying her few cigarettes, but back then, that was such a 'way out' a luxury that kept people who had lived through both wars, well, SANE, that was their 'right' I suppose. Can any one of us 'young' people even imagine what it was like to live between two wars?? And back then smoking wasn't the bad thing it is today!
Anyway, that pot of paint and the little brush. I told Ma about them when I got home. I remember so well Ma counting her pennies, and asking if I knew how much that paint and brush cost, and if Tony, (the shop owner) would take the cigarettes back in exchange for them!
I remember not going back to the shop, whether that was 'cos I wanted Ma to have her cigarettes or just because I couldn't be arsed going back to the shop I can't remember!
But I do remember Ma asking.
That evening is stuck firmly in my head!
Love is such a wonderful thing.